What makes you who you are today?

by Max Danian
After people enter adulthood it is hard to believe that their actions and behaviors are not a result of their responsibilities. Some people never want to admit their shortcomings or failure since they live in a state of denial. It is not fair to say that only "losers" are in this category. Most successful people have been through this stage once or more. The difference here is some never have the courage to get out of the situation. For them living in their own "comfort" zone is the only guaranteed way for survival.

What makes people to be known as "losers" and what makes them to be known as winners? To find the right answer to this question I read many books and thought much too much. I came to the conclusion that winners and so called "losers" have one big thing in common. That big thing directly affects their lives and reflects in their lifestyle. That big thing is they all make DECISIONS!

Life is a process of making decisions and those decisions generally shape our lives. We make decisions constantly. From the crack of dawn to the end of the day, the moment we open our eyes we start to make decisions. Should I get up now or should I stay a little longer in bed? Should I eat light or should I have those yummy bacon and eggs? Should I hurry up and be on time to my class, work, or appointment, should I take it easy, or better yet, just call sick? Should I dress to impress or just show up casual? Am I going to be calm today or should I tear him apart!? You see where I am going? Daily decisions show our personality and temperament.

When a person makes a decision he or she has to go through a complex course in his or her brain. Depending on the nature of the subject and on the time remaining for making a certain decision, one has to process available information in a judgmental manner. This means to use some assessment related or unrelated to that subject to reach a final determination to make a choice. That choice is a decision!

There are small decisions and there are big decisions; there are good decisions, and of course, there are bad ones. Big or small, all decisions are either good or bad.

If a decision helps you achieve your goal, that decision is a good one, no matter small or big. This subject alone can be discussed vastly, but this is not the intention of this article.

What I would like to talk about in this short article is the foundation of making decisions and the impacts of every big decision in the life of each one of us.

Decision making is based on two main factors:

1-The amount of personal knowledge

2- The amount of personal experience

These two factors could potentially be related to each other. I can add another factor to the above list: our personal instincts. The latter is not as substantial in the absence of the other two factors.

Usually the more knowledge and experience someone has in life, the better the decision that person can make. Without doubt, this seems like a simple rule, but not all the time. This rule can not be applied to every circumstance.

If a person has enough knowledge and experience in his/her life, but lacks courage when necessary to take a risk, he/she doesn't take it. The decision he/she makes is not to do anything! People should realize that when they don't take action in situations that require action, they are making a decision by not doing anything at all!

Successful people don't hesitate to make decisions when they need to. They approach their decisions with courage and are willing to take risks when necessary. Even when the outcome of the decision isn't what they had expected, they accept the consequences without regret, knowing that taking calculated risks are an important part of success and decision making.

Successful people base their success on their defeats and they learn from every "bad" decision they have made. This means they don't make the same mistake again and also they don't feel terribly guilty about making them, instead, they continue to build their future based on lessons learnt from those mistakes in a positive manner. Mistakes are actually the foundation of every success.

What I would like to do in this article is to address all those who think they have made so many mistakes that there is no way to recover from them. I'd like to address all people who think they are at the end of their rope, to those who think they are failures and are looking for sympathy. If you are one of these people, I would like to tell you that you are wrong if you think you are done! If you've made mistakes, that's fine, we all do. Your mistakes are your assets; your mistakes are your tools to your future success. Just look at it that way and you will not feel sorry for yourself anymore.

All you need to do is to take the responsibility for making bad decisions and not to blame anybody else, even though you were convinced or pushed by someone else. It is you who ultimately allowed that decision. Your lesson from this experience is: 1- not to give in easily 2- make your own independent mind. Once you reach to this sense, you'll have a better vision to pave the way of your future success.

There are no "losers" in this word. However, there are irresponsible, pitiful naggers and excuse-makers that don't see the treasure they have: a knapsack of mistakes.

If they empty that knapsack and calculate how much each mistake cost them, then they will value their treasure.

So what make us who we are today is our decisions!

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